Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Oui? We? or wii

So Fury and Falstaff took the three of us out to the Helicarrier and gave us a full briefing of the take over. It took a while and was your usual evil plan. Bad guys plot to take over a country without anyone noticing, abuses of power, people paid off or killed. They used the mobile phone network and an internet worm to get control but thing that activated the brainwashing sounded wrong.

"It all came to fruition when the wii was first played with..." said Falstaff

"You mean Oui? French for yes. Don't you?" interupted Christine.
Falstaff sighed.
"No I mean w-i-i its Nintendo's latest gaming console." explianed Falstaff.

"They called it a wee. Gee who was naming it Pee-Wee Herman?" joked Henchy. "Or worse was it some crazy Japanese executive with a urine fetish dreaming of kids playing in...."

"Henchy!" I shouted."Whats wrong with you? You used to be this hard ass mercenary, now you acting like frat boy."

"Hypothermia and concussion makes you a bit different Koma." replied Henchy. "That and having two hot librarian type chicks after you. Am I wrong? No?" He kept silent after that.

We're transfered to a submarine which will take us to Australia. Queensland to be exact.

The plan is that we are going in through the back door. And in northern Queensland you can't get anymore back door. Its full of rednecks and drugged out hippies. We get out of the inflatable that brought us to shore and Falstaff bids us goodbye.

"I've sent four teams before you." He begins in a somber tone. "They didn't come back. Make sure I don't have to send more."

"Hey all my Dad said when he died was 'At least your not gay.'" declared Henchy.

Two days later we were at tourist trap known as The Gold Coast. Its got a lot of really tacky gimmicks.
One of the best know are the bikini clad parking inspectors.

"This country is the best!" exclaimed Henchy excited. "I'd just wait in my car all day to get a ticket from those girls."

"They have guys too Henchy." I tell him. "You could have get a parking ticket one of them."
Christine laughs.

We continue walking and are confronted by three of the meter maids.
"You will wait here for the Quarantine Task Force. They will see to your innoculation." ordered the lead bikini clad meter maid. There's something familiar about them, a level of flawlessness with these women.
"Oh crap!" I sigh. "They're synthoids." My sensors confirm this.
"Sensor sweep detected." the lead maid skwaks.
"Why did you do a sensor sweep?" complains Chroma.
"Reflex. Sorry, they're just so flawless they had to be synthoids but I've been wrong before." I apologise.
"Next time think before you do it." corrects Chroma. "We're supposed to be doing this covertly. Lets just hope we can avoid making a scene."
"Source identified - Captain Koma." skwaks the meter maids in unsion and their eyes go red. Which always means violence is coming.
"Call enforcer Titan-12." sounded off the lead meter maid. Then the three started a hideous series of screaches.
Chroma goes steel and kicks the lead maid the others continue screaching.
"Do I have to do this all by myself?" snaps Chroma.
"Sorry." I answer. I draw my blaster and take out the remaing two maids.
"Dude couldn't you have reprogramed them." complained Henchy.
We ignore him because something else is a bit weird. No one is running away from us or is taking pictures, the cops are just passing us by.
"Innoculation. Mobile Phones. Wii's. Synthoids." I mumble to myself.
Then something strange happens. All the people on the beach just get up and walk away. Calmly as if they all just decided to leave then and there.
"Mind control!" I exclaim. "Innoculation, Mobile Phone's, Wi-Fi. They've used the current signals around to control the whole population."
"Yeah but why are they all leaving?" asked Chroma.

"Um Guys I think thats the reason why?" said Henchy pointing to the large robot monster emerging from the ocean.
Oh carp!

Monday, June 23, 2008

We get back on track

Hi Christine here.
Its been a fortnight since we helped the X-men beat Nemonock and Koma put Xavier's Brain back in his body. Koma got all personal and went away to think about what comes next. I went and had some fun at Logans expense. It was more than worth it. When we finally got back Xavier got intouch with his contact. It was this guy.
Nick Fury he's sometimes black and sometimes white. Also sometimes he's this guy too.
Koma told me that was just some idiot fan at the 1999 Comiccon. Anyway we meet him and he's all cloak and dagger saying that yes he knows whats happened in Australia and that he has two main sources for this information.
"So when do we meet them?" demanded Koma being quite forward. He'd been getting rather frustrated by the fact that Fury would see him earlier. In fact he'd was about to start breaking into the S.H.I.E.L.D. Helicarrier when Fury rang to confirm the place and time for this "little chat" as Fury put it.

"Come with me." said Fury plainly ignoring Koma's demand. We follwed and were ushered into the standard black SUV that you get in secret agencies these days.
In it was Henchy.
"Hey Koma how's it hanging!" greeted the backstaber.
"You!" I growled. I was about to launch at him when Koma grabbed my hand.
"Chirstine, you can hit him next time." he offers.
"Bro's before Ho's, eh! Koma." snaps Henchy back.
"No she'll bash you later. I've already wasted too much time." replied Koma coldly.
"Cold Dude!" remarked Henchy.

Henchy told us how he'd escaped from "Major Dad" as he called my father. He'd gotten into a bit of trouble with both Annabel and Alicia Quest. They'd both tried to help him escape at the same time. Within the confusion of this Henchy was able to make his own escape.
"This Henchman ain't gonna be tied down." he decleared. Then adding. "But theres more than enough to go around if you know what I mean." He put his hand in the air for a high five from Koma. Koma let it hang there.
"Dude don't leave me hanging." pleaded Henchy. Koma didn't reply.
"You said there were two sources?" said Koma changing the subject.

"Yes and were almost at the safe house." answers Fury. The SUV stops and we get out.
"Park Avenue you got me holed up in a rat infested motel 6 in Jersy." complains Henchy.
"Must have felt like home." I reply.

We walk in and Fury leads us into a huge apratment. Its got big guys with dark glasses and ear phones all over the place. They all acknoweledge Fury as he walks in. Inside there's a group of Australian dignitaries some I know others I don't. Its Koma who recognises the one Fury has brought us here for first.

"Falstaff!" he exclaims."You have a lot of explaining to do."

"Austin, Christine you've finally made it back, and 2 years late." replies Falstaff.

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

After party celebrations

I'm sitting in the bar of the Shi'ar Battle Cruiser. They call it a recreation area and they serve a decent fermented nectar drink thats got a nice kick to it. So for me its a bar. I always like to have a drink after surgery and having just put the Professor's Brain into his body. I felt I deserved a drink or two.
It was quiet, just me and the bar guy.
Peace and quiet after all that action with the X-men was exactly what I needed. I had to gather my thoughts. Beating Nemonock was a good thing. Always good to put upstarts like him in their place. As for if he's actually dead meh! As if I care.
I had to get back to the task at hand, saving Australia. Fortunately Xavier was very happy to get his brain back into his body. He said he'd help me out.
After I'd had enough quiet I went to find Xavier and then maybe Chroma. I'm sure she'd be past the victory celebration and be looking for me too.
I found Xavier and Lilandra in the Royal suite with Jon IG most of the X-men. I told Xavier about the problem in Austalia and that I needed verifiable information on the truth of the take over.
"I know just the person who has his finger on the pulse. I'll put you in contact with him when we get back to Earth." he smiled a wry smile. "Oh and Koma about revealing that I use the chair for sympathy. Forget about it."
His eyes were mesmeric....I was doing something gee that nectar drink really has a kick.
"I think I've had a bit too many right now Chuck." I excused myself and went to find Chroma.

She was out on the promenade watching the stars.
"Hey." I say casually making my relaxed presence known.
"So you've had enough peace and quiet huh?" she asked.
"Yep!" I reply as I put my arm around her waist. She didn't pull away or move my arm. Thats a good sign.
"I just want to stay here for a while and watch the stars." she tells me. I'm cool with that. For a while.

Standing there my peaceful platinum paramour beside me and the glory of the cosmos. It was perfect.

Then the ship shuddered a bit. My sensors were patched into the Battle Cruiser and told me an esacape pod had launched.
"What number escape pod launched?" she asked.
"22." I replied. "How did you know that was an escape pod?"
"Oh Wolverine wanted to get back to earth early. So I gave him a going away present" she smiled wickedly.
"What?" I asked.
"Oh I may have found Scott and told him that Emma was waiting for him in Escape pod 22, naked." she laughed.

I laughed too.
I'm not saying it to her now. But I love this woman.